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Synthesis - Columns

From 2008 to 2015 I wrote a weekly column for Synthesis Weekly under the name Zooey Mae. What started as an outlet to review graphic novels and comic books evolved over the years to cover everything from pop culture to whatever menial event was happening in my life. Looking back, I think I spent much too much time regaling Chico with tales of my allergies. 

The Truth Is Out There

Originally published in Synthesis Weekly: October 2012

It seems fall weather is finally here to stay. Riding a bike down the wrong streets can be a dodgy choice, becoming a gauntlet of sorts, with falling leaves and tiny gnats all aiming for your eyeballs, as acorns and chestnuts rain down unrelentingly. It’s perfect timing really, what with Halloween right around the corner. I mean, what would All Hallows Eve be without the requisite female population walking in huddled groups, arms clutched tightly to their chests in an attempt to raise their core temperature, and enough synthetic material between every five of them to make maybe one full outfit. Maybe.

Since this particular issue of Synthesis was released on the 29th, I’ve decided to go with something of a Halloween theme. For those readers who (like me) put off the selecting of a costume because it really snuck up this year, because they believe Halloween is dumb, or (like me) because the anguish of midterms and all the usual trappings of social anxiety and the like have prevented any frivolous endeavors from taking place, I’ve compiled some costume ideas for you. A nerd-esque list of possible choices for you, dear reader. Shall we?

Daenerys Targaryen
This one requires a long white wig, a brown (preferably leather), top and long skirt and/or pants. Devotees will go with the Daenerys fresh out of the fire, with nothing but the wig, a nude body suit; ash smeared everywhere, and three baby dragons. Dragons!  

Roland the Gunslinger
Stephen King enthusiasts might enjoy this one, although you will definitely spend all night telling people you’re not a cowboy, and you’ll live for that handful of people who tentatively inquire, “Roland?” For this you’ll need a long-sleeved shirt, a brown ankle-length duster, wide brimmed hat, red bandanna worn around the neck, and (naturally), guns worn in hip holsters.

Krang (TMNT)
You’ll have to get creative with this one, but really that’s the beauty of it. There really are no limits to what you can do with papier-mâché, paint, and aluminum foil. If anyone actually does this one, please send me a picture.

Yorick (Y The Last Man)
This costume all comes down to the monkey on the shoulder. Other than that it’s just a pair of Chuck Taylors, jeans, white t-shirt, dark blue hooded poncho and a gas mask. This is another one you’ll probably spend explaining all night.

Scully & Mulder
It seems as though the X-Files has enjoyed a bit of a resurgence of popularity in the last few years. This costume is achievable in the singular, but not advisable. It’s way better when wearing suits and FBI badges, if someone can’t figure out what you’re dressed as and you can just exchange glances with your counterpart and mutter things like “trust no one”, and “sometimes the only sane answer to an insane world is insanity”.

Well kids, that’s all the Halloween-themed ideas I can pull out of my brain for now. If anyone has a costume they’re particularly proud of, please send it to me, I love Halloween!

Arielle Mullen